A Friendship of Unequals (Tunisia)

Said did not return home to Maztouria, as he could not afford to. Instead, we met in Djerba where he was working in a touristy hotel catering to Germans and other Europeans. Puffs of apple-scented tobacco ascended into the air, a mild bobbling sound reverberating on the ground, as we caught up with one another over sheesha. Said was pleased to see me back in the country, but it was obvious that something else was on his shoulders.

Slowly, he told of contemptuous treatment by Western holidaymakers, even though he and other Tunisians are the masters of this land. While his earning here was higher than what he could have achieved in Tataouine, it was still difficult to have to serve alien couples and families who regarded him with little respect, as if he was a mere thief who plied on tourist money. But I was not a "tourist" but his brother, he said, because I appreciated the culture and traditions of Tunisia and was well loved by his family.

Opportunities are rare in Tunisia. While tourism is a booming industry there, its salutary effects are lost on the vast majority of Tunisians. With record high unemployment and rising prices, young people who make up the bulk of the population are forced to look elsewhere for their livelihood. Going to university is not a realistic option, as tuition is high and there is a huge shortage of jobs anyway. Sadly, a phenomenon has developed in which young men are engaged in alternative prostitution--many have chosen to become boyfriends to older white women in hopes of obtaining free passage into Fortress Europe.

Said was contemplating something along this line, although it was marriage to a young beautiful Czech woman with whom he had interacted that he had in mind. As if to allay my doubts, he told me that this was a far more promising path for him, given the circumstances in which he found himself. Papa Ali was getting old; the entire family was looking for ways to accumulate savings to allow him to perform the hajj in Saudi Arabia, a rite of passage that was far beyond their means.

Marriage with a European woman would be easier, even though she was not Muslim, as Said could then work in a continent where wages were far higher than the meager $5/day that he could ever expect to earn at home. Moreover, a European woman could certainly afford air travel; she would be able to financially support her bon homme should the need arise.

I could not help Said in any way. Having to sacrifice one's own beliefs and leave loved ones behind for a foreign (usually hostile) land, is a difficult matter for migrants and refugees all around the world. In his shoes, I would very likely consider the same option. But I am not similarly situated as Said. I can afford to travel the world for no other divine purpose than pleasure, even if I was backpacking on a shoestring. I also have life opportunities that many Tunisians can never imagine. And when I think of all these asymmetries between me and Said, I could utter little in the way of advice or assistance to my friend.